The thrill remains

Hey L. You still owe me a dollar, don't you?

No, I gave you your dollar last Wednesday. You don't remember?

Oh. Well, I'll give you back that dollar if you go to Cadaver Prom with me...

Oh. Ok. Well, I'm watching a movie right now.

Ok.

I'll call you back.

I'm going to sleep in an hour, so make your movie quick."

L. calls back, and says YES, to my amazement!

Launry Detergent Thief

Two months ago, I realized that someone was stealing the laundry detergent that I keep in the communal laundry room. Every week, another three loads' worth of detergent would disappear. My half-full bottle would be nearly empty when I needed to use it. So before I left for Italy, I took the nearly empty bottle of Tide Free and filled it up with vegetable oil. Looks exactly the same. That'll teach them.

When I got back, I was shocked to discover that 1/3 of the bottle was gone. This means that the person did MANY (like 8) loads with vegetable oil. They didn't notice something different about their clothes?

I filled up the bottle again with more vegetable oil. And when I checked it a few weeks later - the same thing. WTF?

I'm not sure if I should just keep filling up the bottle with vegetable oil, or if I should write on the bottle "You've been washing your clothes in vegetable oil for the last two months, you detergent-stealing asshole!" Thoughts?

Pro-Choice Rally

Today is the 35th anniversary of Roe v. Wade. There's one student in my class, Student L, who is very active with Medical Students for Choice. In the hall today, she persuaded me to attend a rally that abortion rights proponents were having later in the day. At first I was non-committal, but finally agreed to (she's kind of cute).

So I showed up wearing my white coat. It was drizzling out and slightly above freezing. I was expecting a stage with a speaker and a bunch of people cheering. A rally, right? Wrong.

They were standing on the busiest street in town. As I approached, someone handed me a sign (I held the Roe part of the Roe v. Wade HONK!" sign complex). A woman advised me to stand as close to the curb as possible because anti-abortionists would probably come and try to stand in front of us. So I stood there, holding my sign and waving a flag every time someone honked, which was not that often in the Bible Belt. A woman came up to me and asked if I would be willing to be interviewed by News Channel 4. Sure, I said. More people showed up. My gloveless hands were already numb. The drizzle intensified.

Student L as well as several other med students (including Student E) finally showed up, 20 minutes late. Making their signs had taken longer than expected.

Only a few anti-abortionists showed up. One guy stood behind me (I was right next to the curb), and constantly muttered something about the "value of life."

There were plenty of honks after a while. All (maybe 40) of us formed a line on the curb that was hard to ignore. One passenger in a car leaned over to honk the horn, causing the car to swerve. Another minivan drove by, all six kids emphatically giving us the thumbs down. Guess the parents didn't use birth control.

Student L asked me "Do you really think we're actually accomplishing anything?" "No," I said. "We're probably just pissing off the religious folk."

"Yeah, you're right," she said. "But that's ok by me."

"Me too... Me too."

Ears, Nose, and Throat

The doctor looked into the medical student's ear. "Too much ear wax." She looked into the other ear. "Wow, even more wax! Who else wants to volunteer to be the patient?"

I rose my hand, sat down in the chair, and the doctor inserted the otoscope. "Beautiful tympanic membrane with almost no wax. Your ear canal is unusually straight. Ought to be perfect for demonstrating."

"Q-tip every morning" I said. "That's probably not the greatest idea" she responded.

Student E grabbed the otoscope, peered in, and said she saw the eardrum. Mission accomplished.

Student L then took the scope. She couldn't see anything, so her solution was to insert the scope farther with a quick jabbing motion, which evoked a sharp yelp from me. She appologized profusely.

Then it was off to the nose. The doctor inserted the speculum and peered in. "Hmm, slight deviation of the nasal septum to the right. Now you guys take a look. Just remember NOT to close the speculum before removing it, or you'll take out some hairs."

Student L took a look without complication. Then student Y did, but apparently forgot the doctor's instructions in the intervening 30 seconds. He closed the speculum while taking it out, taking five nose hairs with him. You could see them still attached to the speculum.

"Owww! Goddamnit" was my reaction. My right eye started watering. Student Y appologized profusely and got me a tissue.

I asked the doctor why pulling nose hairs caused tearing.

"It's called pain" she responded.

Natchez Trace

Today I drove to the natchez trace and took a few photos. It was bitterly cold, especially on the bridge with the blowing wind. Normally I would have ridden my bicycle there, but it was just too cold today. Then I drove to Wal-Mart to buy some 3X5" index cards to study pharmacology.

Earlier today was parent's weekend at school. My parents and I got there at 7:45. I'll bet the school spent well over 100K on everything. There was a huge tent, zillions of servers, wonderful food, a lot of speeches, etc. The highlight was the "organ recital" that the pathology professors put together for the parents. They were shown lungs, kidneys, hearts, etc., all with varying stages of diseases. Tonight is a dinner for everyone, which I won't be going to since my parents can't make it.

Standardized Patients

I was walking out the door when I ran into my psychiatrist neighbor. I said "I'm going to interview a standardized patient today!" He said "what's a standardized patient?" I was a little surprised. I said "It's an actor who's paid to pretend to be a real patient. We get to practice on him." He said, "I my day, we just interviewed real patients. There's plenty at the mental health cooperative that would be jumping at the chance to get interviewed for 15 bucks an hour." Hmm.

So I left for school. The patient was a 40 year old man. The presentation was so classic I almost started laughing. Unilateral headache, "shimmering" visual aura, slowly progressing, pounding pain, lasting about a day. Nausea.

A migraine headache. Case solved. I reassured him that he didn't have a brain tumor, which he was worried about. It was kind of thrilling actually. Putting all that I knew together and making a diagnosis, even though it was a fake patient. I even knew how he should be treated.

Hopefully the next one will be more challenging.

Standardized Patients

Today I had my first encounter with a standardized patients. These people are actors who are paid to simulate real patients. They are given a list of symptoms, and act like real patients while we interview them. The first was depressed, the second had classical angina, and the third had carpel tunnel syndrome. It's great that we can interview these patients and hone our skills without actually having to deal with any real patients. If we screw up, it won't actually mean anything. Plus they can give us feedback on how we did.

Today I spent three and a half hours in the gym. I did cardio, lifted with Kam, and then played squash with him for a long time. He and I are almost perfectly matched.